Is it worse than Pandora's box? Your partner's phone!

The latest research by Samsung Electronics [1] shows that 40 percent of adults and 43 percent of teenagers think that the information stored on your phone is not part of anyone else. If we reverse the question, only one-fifth of adults say that anyone can look at their phones, while only 11 percent of teenagers think so. At the same time, with the proliferation of smartphones, our most daring secrets and innermost thoughts are easier to access than ever before. According to the research, 40% of adults and 61% of adolescents admit that they had already seen that they had looked into another phone. Although digitalisation has changed social relationships on essential points, the same psychological mechanisms work behind human behavior. If we multiply these two factors - occasions and jealousy - the consequence is that there is no force relationship game that does not promise much.

Who and why are they searching for secrets?

Experts first and foremost associate both jealousy and relationship spying with uncertainty about ourselves. Jealous people do not dare to rely on their own assessment and feel the relationship without their say. They can also look for evidence of this or that infidelity in the other party's phone or applications. The main driving force may be the desire for control: the spies constantly try to control where they are and what the other is doing and try to "get a lie . " Samsung's research shows that 76 percent of adults say it is not important in my relationships to look at their partners' phones because it reinforces distrust. " If instead of open, honest communication we choose the investigation in our relationship, then from a psychological point of view it is basically nothing else than the lack of self-confidence and relationship trust, " summarizes Skultéti-Szabó Katalin, clinical psychologist.

There are two cases of well-functioning relationships: the couple can agree to treat each other's surfaces transparently. They know each other's e-mail and social media passwords, codes, and agree to see other people's personal messages and accounts. This type of agreement is rare, more typical of mature people and relationships.

Also in the case of confident, well-functioning couples, the attitude is that the parties do not look at each other's phones and surfaces. “ In the relationship, the two parties form the rules together. If communication works well with them and healthy personalities, there is no cause for distrust ” , says Katalin Skultéti-Szabó, clinical psychologist. Problems begin when one or both parties secretly look at the other's letters and messages. The expert thinks: " When couples are in such a situation, they are worthy of counting whether they match each other or are capable of matching their problems."

The subject of Samsung's research was the theme of the comedy sponsored by the company, BÚÉK. The film seeks to find out how mobile and social interaction affect each other. “ It is also important to be aware of the dangers and consequences of having a relationship in a sequential sniffing. Through mobile technology, the smartphone becomes a tool in the hands of man, and everyone is responsible for ethical use, ”said Zsófia Samu, Head of Communications at Samsung Electronics Magyar Zrt.

5 reasons not to sniff:

You don't even want to be a voyeur? Exploring the secrets of others is the hallway of harassment. It is a serious border crossing that cannot have a constructive effect on either the relationship or the spying personality.

Owl says sparrow? What is the success of the sniffing party? A flirting message certainly! But how can the other party be confronted with secret information? The spy immediately loses his moral superiority by lurking behind the other.

Comedy of mistakes. Messages can be easily misunderstood without context. Not everything that seems to be, and misinterpreting a harmless message can cause serious conflict between the parties. " If one of the parties is convinced that the other is on the wrong track and is going to investigate, he will look for it, adjust the information he has acquired," says Katalin Skultéti-Szabó in the process.

What does not kill you, makes you stronger? This is not always true. Spying is a sign of weakness and makes it weak: if you regularly cultivate, change your personality, make you bitter. Living the lives of others is always worse than ours.

There is something that cannot be forgiven. By spying and discovering it, we can even cause damage that is irreparable. If one party breaks the trust in this way, the end of the action may be a break, in a way unworthy of the parties.

(Source: marmalade.co.uk | Image: pixabay.com)